Friends are integral part of life. As the old saying goes, we don’t get to choose our family but we certainly can choose friends. And that is a very wonderful power to possess. We always tend to do what’s best for our friends. Many times by going out of the way. We give them right direction, right opinion and share wisdom best for them.
But most of us do not do the same to self. We donot give ourselves the benefit of doubt, treat ourselves poorly and beats the shit out of self for reasons which do not carry as much weight.
One day I was asked : ‘Would you like being friends to a person like you? ‘. I answered proudly with a yes. And then I was asked to reconsider the question from a different perception. ‘So you are happy to have friends who treat themselves poorly?’ 😐 ‘Doesn’t it bother you when your friends do not do what is best for them’ ‘Would you do or suggest the same thing to a friend that you are doing to self?’
I realised.. I wasn’t my friend. I didn’t treat myself as fairly as I treated friends. And more over I didn’t do things in my best interest.
So I reflected a lot and stopped bullying myself over grave matters and try really hard to be my best friend.
And last year has been a wonderful year of friendship ❤️
You have been strict
You have been soft
You have been adamant
You have been what not
You have me carry you on my sleeves
Most importantly, dear heart
You have been what I stopped being.
Thanks for teaching me what my brain could not.
Happy Teacher’s Day!
In 2018,after a hiatus of almost 2 years I tried to make a comeback to reading. Reading transports me to a world filled with people and their problems which are better or worse than mine. I try to see through the eyes of characters and think from their minds. Reading broadens my perspective. I use goodreads to set my reading goal in the beginning of every year and try to achieve it.
For 2018, I set a goal of 24 books which I couldn’t keep up with as I was dawdling through each page for several days. I did not even finish 6 books by September. It was time to modify my original goal as I realized the coming months are going to be super busy and maintaining a reading schedule will be impossible. I brought down my reading goal to 12 books and read unfailingly, completing 10 books by December, even with a super active schedule. Though I couldn’t reach my goal I worked very hard in last 2 months to reach closer to it as much as possible (finished one book in a day sitting in hospital). I was happily doing this as that’s the level of commitment I wanted to show myself. I read some of the most amazing authors like Paulo Coelho , Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning (I will cover this book’s review in another post)
Now, for 2019 I have kept a more realistic goal of 15 books which I am secretly willing to surpass 😉 . I have not yet exactly decided which Authors I will focus but as of now my interest lies in reading more Indian authors of English and regional languages and one of the genre will be Self Help/Psychology.
What are you reading this year?
This year was tough but not as tough as last two years. I had to come to terms with a lot of things. Below are my major learning :
- Life is going to be progressively challenging, accept it gracefully.
- One decision can change your life and shift your crust.
- 30’s is tougher than you thought, be grateful for the earlier years.
- People are going to be mean even if you are their well-wishers.
- People will hate you for doing the right thing, don’t expect standards.
- Everyone has agenda, be careful.
- Healing takes longer than you think and its OK.
- Your plans are bound to fail but keep making them.
- Sometimes just being able to breathe is a sign of warrior.
- Books provide a lot of answers that your inner self is searching.
- Legal system sucks, you can’t do much about it.
- Even the closest people will not be able to understand exactly how you feel, guide them.
- Even the best of people have a little bad in them don’t get disappointed, tackle them.
- Loneliness is real and addictive. Meditate more often.
- Depression is difficult to decode, just go with the flow.
- Its OK to cry for hours.
- Negativity will creep into you even if you are full of positive energy.
- Mental health affects physical well being severely, take care of your mental health.
- Smiling is difficult but you have to.
- Therapy will work only if you believe in it.
2018 was all about coming to terms with life!
Today out of nowhere I decided ‘It’s enough’.
I am sitting on this semi-comfortable maroon chair, thinking shall I get up to make some tea for me. Well, I have been thinking of this since past 2 hours… arghhh!! This is me today and most of the days when it comes to writing my blog. Procrastinator becomes my second name.
I am not a procrastinator in my daily life. I keep hustling not just to make a living but to also live this beautiful-but-ugly-at-times life. I have multiple to-do lists based on duration like a weekend to-do list to an yearly to-do list. And not just that I make lists, my lists keeps on moving and updating. It gives me immense pleasure when I cross a certain task on my list *smiling at the moment*
In all this hustling, writing has taken a back seat. I have not been giving myself enough time to write my journal. This only proves that writing a blog is not even in the scene.
This is one part. The second part is –
I am unsure of what to write here so that my readers like it. I did not think this through when I joined the blogging world. But now that I have, I am constantly under the pressure of what you people will like to read rather than what I would love to write.
Hence my brain suddenly shouted ‘Ok enough’ and this maroon chair rocked as if agreeing to it.
This made me open my blog and write 🙂
From now I am adding blogging to my to-do list and going to write what I wish to share with you all 🙂
Hope it makes you as happy as me.